Several months ago (in June, to be precise) I offered in this space a series of questions designed to help readers discern whether or not they had the qualities of judgment that are expected in an American Catholic bishop. Some readers later pointed out that the test was incomplete, and with their help I now offer some further diagnostic aids.

The following questions are based on the assumption that the reader is currently serving as the bishop’s secretary.

I: Appropriate Responses
Four letters to the bishop arrive in the morning mail. Each letter comes from a respectable Catholic man, with whom the bishop is acquainted vaguely or not at all. Each letter contains some news:

• A writes that his pastor has repeatedly preached, in unmistakably clear terms, that the Eucharist is a symbol, and belief in the Real Presence is an old wives’ tale.
• B writes that he has a substantial estate and no heirs. He would like to contribute $2 million to the diocese; the only stipulation is that a building should be named in honor of his mother.
• C writes that he’s an old college classmate, happens to have an extra seat at the 50-yard line for the big game on Saturday, and wonders whether the bishop would like to join some old buddies.
• D writes that he thinks the DRE is molesting the altar boys in his parish.

1. I’m sure this guy means well, but I really don’t have time for this sort of thing. Find a polite way to get rid of him.
2. Get in touch with this man, see if he sounds sensible, get some details, and give me a report before lunch.
3. We have an office down the hall to deal with this sort of thing. I shouldn’t have to get directly involved.
4. Warm up the car. We’re about to go make a surprise visit.

II: Statements for the press
Occasionally you are put into the position in which you must make public statements on behalf of the bishop. In response to a heated local controversy, which group should you be ready to accuse of using “the rhetoric of condemnation?”

1. Gay-rights activists.
2. The local chapter of the National Organization for Women.
3. Activists from People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals.
4. Pro-life sidewalk counselors.

1. A representative of the Young Americans for Transgendered Gay and Lesbians (OK, I admit that I made up the name of the group. But you can be sure there’s something reasonably close out there.)
2. A wealthy diocesan benefactor who is wondering whether the Pope may one day admit Mary into the Godhead.
3. A group of parishioners irritated that their pastor preaches too often in opposition to abortion.
4. A group of parishioners irritated that their pastor preaches too often in support of gay rights.

1. Sen. Edward M. Kennedy
2. Mother Angelica
3. Joe Scheidler
4. Hillary Clinton
5. Whoopi Goldberg
6. Sammy Sosa
7. Rep. Barney Frank
8. Ivan Demjanjuk
9. Pat Robertson
10. Pat Buchanan
11. Pat Schroeder
12. Bill Donohue
13. Phil Donahue

1. Next June the bishop will be receiving honorary degrees in various places in which he would be sharing the dais with the aforementioned persons. In which cases do you advise him to decline the honor? In which cases is a statement explaining the decision required?
2. The bishop will be celebrating a televised funeral Mass for a local dignitary with the aforementioned persons in attendance. Whom do you inform beforehand that they are not at liberty to receive Communion?
3. The photographer for the diocesan paper has taken photos showing the bishop in the company of the aforementioned persons in groups of twos and threes at various occasions in the past month. Which photos should go on page one? Which photos should be absolutely banned from publication? Which photos should the bishop autograph and send to the person who requested it?