A genuine life of prayer
is one of hidden,
ordinary holiness and regular duties.

Intrigued by prayer
By Carolyn Humphreys

Although it is the most basic expression of our relationship with God, Christians understand prayer in interesting and various ways. For some it is the repetition of sounds which have unknown, soothing or lost significance. For others it is a mysterious activity rarely engaged in and is basically associated with church professionals. However, for the vast majority of Christians, it is the primary way to strengthen their relationship with God. It is the foundation that supports their service to others.

The best way to establish a friendship with God is through prayer. This requires an unshakable faith and a steady confidence that with God’s help, all will be well. We can be like an airline pilot flying at night or through a storm. He, or she, depends upon radar contact with the control tower to keep on course. The pilot is able to arrive at the destination without seeing the way ahead. As Christians we make our way through darkness and trials by using prayer as a radar of sorts. There are times when we feel we are going off course or we cannot see what lies ahead, but if we maintain contact with God things will come out all right in the end. We are able to keep moving in darkness and storms because God is in control.

There is an infinite variety of ways to pray. Active prayer is when the person is actively communicating with God. The most common division of active prayer is vocal and mental prayer. Vocal prayer is that prayer which uses words cast in a set form and commonly employed in that form such as the prayers in the Mass, hymns, psalms, prayers written by saints, or novenas for specific purposes. Mental prayer is that form of prayer in which one does not recite a fixed form of prayer. This prayer springs from the personal efforts of the one praying and the workings of grace. Mental prayer can be divided into two types: discursive and affective. Discursive prayer is that in which an idea or a divine truth taught by Christ or his church is considered and closely examined in the mind. At its conclusion practical applications for our lives are made. Affective prayer is more a movement of the heart. One’s heart spontaneously reacts by a flowing of love for some mystery or item of faith which has been understood previously or accepted and analyzed in terms of its significance or consequences. An example would be looking at a crucifix and reacting with a deeply felt “My Lord and my God.”

Contemplative prayer is passive prayer because it is initiated by God. It can range from a quiet awareness of his presence to the mystical union. There are several stages of contemplative prayer. One example is prayer of the eyes of the soul by simply gazing at truth. Said another way it is the saturation of the soul with a divine truth through the loving gaze of one who is enraptured in God. A person experiences a deep delight in God. There is an unexpected cherished joy of the beauty of divine wisdom made known to the soul. Each of the various degrees of contemplative prayer is a gift from God available to all Christians. The beauty of contemplative prayer is never ending precisely because it is experienced in so many forms. Its essence is a deep awareness of God’s great love for us, which we barely understand.

It is important to remember that there is no one way of praying, and one way is not better than another. All prayer should lead to intimacy with God and solidarity with all creation. The scope of prayer ranges from the deeply muddled to the highly mystical. It is never adequately defined. Our rendezvous with prayer should result in ways to improve our lives according to Gospel values. If we persevere as time goes on, there is more emphasis on just looking at whom we are seeking. We become awesomely absorbed by fragments of God’s being, but we are unable to see him in his entirety. We ask: What wondrous Love is this? Most of the time the answer is shrouded in mystery!

Know thyself
The most important medium we use when we explore the vast realm of the spiritual dimension is open communication with God. Through its daily practice, we take the time to examine our lives and acknowledge our faults. We resolve to do better and love God and others more. Through God centered reflection, we face who and what we are.

Self knowledge enables us to see how God gradually takes control of our lives. He hollows us out slowly in the strangest ways and he makes room for himself. Our egos diminish as God’s presence grows within us. It is painful to acknowledge that he does not really need our work, plans, efforts or gifts because we are so egotistical. Nevertheless, we reflect the love of God not so much by what we do but by who we are. Self absorption must diminish if awareness of the divine is to grow. Self knowledge helps us to accept our limitations without self pity, and to work with them and through them. By receiving grace and trying our best we learn that God can use anything to free us from the cages of our egos. To grow in self knowledge is to pass from focusing on our own power, control and independence to humanity’s unity, harmony and interdependence in the light of gospel values. Self knowledge in the light of God’s mercy is a significant part of our spiritual journey. It increases as we move toward our ultimate reality which is union with God.

The quality of our life supersedes the quantity of that which makes up our days. Daily communion with God helps us give ourselves to him at the beginning of each day without reserve. By being faithful to daily prayer, all other duties and responsibilities fall into place. Open lines of communication with God help us to be less concerned about disruptive or delightful events of the day or that which happened in our past or may happen in our future. God will be with us through the incidents in our lives as a loving father is with his child. Of this we are assured because in retrospect, when we look closely, we can see everything that happens to us as a blessing. Blessings come in a myriad of colors. Almost anything can expand our capacity to be filled with Christ’s love and the ability to pass his love to others. Anything can serve as a wrapping for grace. A person long on the road of prayer will know that God wants to possess us more than we want to possess him: and that he does, if we are willing to say a daily yes to him.

John Chrysostom once said that “Prayer is the place of refuge for every worry, a foundation for cheerfulness, a source of constant happiness, a protection against sadness and depression of the soul.” He is quite right, however, how often do we really take advantage of this bounty? As we look into the treasures of prayer we might blush as we reflect how we foolishly bypassed our time for prayer or neglected to appreciate the treasures of that gift. No matter how busy our days, we must realize that prayer is our lifeline to God. In our time of prayer we leave our limited existence and open ourselves to something bigger than we will ever be or can imagine. There are no human limits, time or space within the majesty of God. What one person knows of him is infinitesimal, a mere drop in the ocean. In the tenth century, St. Symeon described this well. He compared the human knowledge of God to someone standing at the edge of an ocean at midnight trying to see across it with the light from a lantern. What we see with this light barely reflects what we know about God.

To pray without ceasing does not mean continual discursive prayer or the nonstop use of words. One basic definition is to live our lives in the abiding presence of God and in accordance with the Gospels. The early fathers of the church liked to use the image of climbing a mountain to define the nature of prayer. To climb without ceasing is no easy task. John of the Cross said God helps us to pray when we begin a deliberate effort to find him. John continues by reminding us that God is looking for us more eagerly than we are looking for him. If we persevere on our mountain climb to God and with God, his presence is unbelievably profound. As we trod up the slopes, we grow in our appreciation of God and prayer. The spiritual journey is hard labor, a great privilege and the purest of joys.

As Christian pilgrims we pass through this life with no lasting home. Although God made everything, all things are passing. All he made bears his goodness. As we move ahead on the spiritual road, our renewed vision focuses on this goodness and brings it to the fore. Bearing witness to God’s goodness fuses the sacred with the secular. In the depths of prayer we find that everything finite is a stepping stone to and reminder of the infinite.

The spirit and mystery of prayer is the very essence of the Christian life. We cannot survive without it. We are pilgrims of prayer which keeps us ever moving on the slopes of our spiritual mountain. Our journey is marked by roots in the teachings of Jesus, growth in his love, and flowers through the nitty gritty routines and service of our days. This adventure bears fruit by fertilizing with more love, the way we do our most mundane duties, for we never know where it will lead us.

A life centered on Jesus enables us to maintain true values and supports us when we go through tough times. Keeping Jesus’ teachings in mind helps us keep our balance in many ways on the slippery slopes present in our society. The cross is all around us, as well as within, penetrating to the very marrow of our bones. There is so much suffering, but the fruits of a God centered life help us cope. They bring us face to face with the evils in society and in ourselves, looks at them with love, and works toward change. We strive to be fully present to the world but not of it. We struggle for self honesty, negating self absorption. As we discern substance from accidentals, we become more open to the wonders of creation and the gifts of grace. Daily communion with God makes known to us something of the truth and riches of God.

Loving attention is the essence of prayer. Our loving attention is proportionate to the quality of our love. Genuine love demands significant self control of body, mind and spirit. We bring our poor, wretched selves to the living and true God and remain with him despite distractions. Our focus is primarily on God, not on self or events. This is no easy task! It is the challenge of a lifetime! Silence and surrender to God are conditions for reverence and awe. Through these conditions God’s activity becomes more important than our own.

True gold
Authentic prayer brings silence to the center. Through it we meet God and watch with him. We are still, receptive and open. In quiet prayer revelations and discoveries can be nonexistent, unexpected or even unimaginable. It seems we are in a barren land, but we are least alone. We quietly pray for others and we who pray for others become convinced of our own need for reform. We see our own deep need for conversion and act on it. Devotional orisons that used to bring comfort no longer seem to do so. Slowly we begin to discover the treasures in silence.

We hear the word of God in the milieu of silence. Out of that milieu, God spoke one word through which the world was created and redeemed. We are quietly receptive to this word and through it we gradually learn to be attentive to truth. What whets the appetite for spiritual nourishment? It is silence. When we become aware of this, a time for silence in our daily lives becomes essential.

To know the beauty of silence is rare, and to find time for it is no easy task. Our preoccupation with discoveries in communication and technology can lead us to believe silence is only a void to be filled, a clumsy gap in communication or an absence of profit. Authentic reality sets in when silence balances speaking and fosters an openness to others. Silence restores us to our authentic selves after an outpouring of our own words, or hearing incessant talk from others. Too many words can dissipate and deplete us in known and unknown ways.

Discovering the richness of silence is a life long process. Its various treasures take place at the least expected times. The gifts of silence are like flowers that bloom in the different seasons of our lives.

Exterior and interior silence complement each other. They are positive or negative, or can exist one without the other. The primary contender of exterior silence is the movement of the tongue. The first screw that loosens in a person’s head is often the one that holds the tongue in place. For people who are accustomed to talking very much, tongue control can be a challenging struggle. John of the Cross offers some advice. “Great wisdom is to be able to keep silence and to look neither at the words nor at the deeds, nor at the lives of others.” He also counsels, “Better to conquer the tongue than to fast on bread and water.” Disciplining what one says uncovers silent places in the heart. Exterior silence is augmented by limiting speech and turning down volume controls. It also can lead to interior silence.

Most self-oriented thoughts and behaviors erode inner quiet. Interior silence begins when schemes, concerns and agendas of the ego or other self oriented mannerisms are laid aside. They decrease as a God-centered love grows within us. Interior silence disciplines the mind, imagination and memory. It promotes spiritual growth through greater sensitivity and perception to the actions of grace. We become more aware of our own vulnerabilities, weaknesses and struggles. Hidden ambitions, unnecessary anxieties and inner conflicts prevent us from being honest with ourselves, others and God. Unnoticed or hidden by a multitude of external or internal words, our inner milieu can often be confusing or unstable. As the words clear, we realize that we are capable of committing the vilest of sins. The hidden and sinister voice of evil makes itself heard in the least likely places. We feel strongly tempted but we remember temptations are not sins. We are like a watch person in a lighthouse. We look for signs of stormy or calm seas. We maintain an attentiveness to messages that come from evil or good. The absence of ego and the presence of God centered discipline refines our ability to interpret the source of the message. Although pieces of our being may surround us like the shards of a bowl that broke on the floor, silence helps us be still and wait for the answers. Slowly, when we least expect it, we are connected in the least likely places. Indeed, the glue of God’s graces can appear from an unknown, quiet source within us. We are surprised gently as we realize what is really important. It is not what we do. It is our ability to increase, by ever so little, the amount of love that exists in the world in our various activities. As noted in a line from a prayer: The love that we have wasted O God of love renew.

Positive, peaceful silence conveys love more than most words. Silence between friends indicates they are comfortable and at home in each other’s presence. The need to fill up unexpected silence times with words is not necessary. When visiting a person who is sick, silence can nurture courtesy, respect and healing. Silence places the need to chatter in its proper perspective because it increases our authenticity. We accept and respect our human nature and grow through our pain.

Meister Echart wrote: “There is nothing more like God than silence.” We become content with the silence of God outside or inside of prayer. Through and in silence we stand still before God and we find the beauty of his reality. The silence of God’s love is too great for any expression. The book of Wisdom tells us: “When night was at its deepest point and all was stilled and silent, your Word O Lord came down.” To this Word we listen, respond to love, and live and listen again.

A genuine life of prayer is one of hidden, ordinary holiness and regular duties. Extraordinary spiritual fruitfulness is found in ordinary life. True prayer is contrary to the vibrant and opposite of novelty because it opposes appearances and superficiality. The reality of life is lived from within prayer, in silence, and through practical charity. We take Jesus to the streets, the work place, our families and parish by our love. St. Thérèse tells us, “In my little way, there will be something for all tastes, except for those in extraordinary ways.” We become saints by hidden and ordinary virtues. Holiness is our most authentic goal because it involves no illusions. A healthy sense of realism is an ongoing challenge. Indeed, everyday decisions and circumstances deepen or diminish our relationship with God and they foster or hinder our love for others. Our stronghold in life is our faith, grounded in Jesus, nourished by prayer and challenged in the service of love. We reflect upon the words of John Henry Newman with great contentment: “May he support us all the day long, til the shades lengthen, and the evening comes, and the busy world is hushed, and the fever of life is over, and our work is done. Then in his mercy may he give us a safe lodging and a holy rest and peace at the last.”