Be convinced that with God’s grace you can live
the virtue of purity well,
and give good example to those around you.

Purity as a joyful affirmation
By Michael E. Giesler

The following homily was written thinking of an audience of fairly constant Church attenders, who have heard some doctrinally sound things about chastity before — either in preaching, confession, spiritual direction, or other sources. It takes into account that there will be many different kinds of people in the congregation, of all ages and backgrounds, as might be the case at a typical Sunday Mass. It has also been made a little longer than normal to give the homilist more material to reduce or synthesize according to the needs of his parish or community.

“For this is the will of God, your sanctification . . . let everyone of you learn how to make use of his body in holiness and honor” (1 Thess. 4:3-5). In speaking to the early Christians, our first brothers and sisters in the faith, Saint Paul emphasized the importance of the virtue of chastity. It is God’s will that they should respect their bodies and the holy purpose for which they were made. They should live now as his children — in freedom and dignity — and not fall back into pagan habits, or, as he says in another letter, into the impulses of the “carnal man” (cf. 1 Cor. 2:14). If these men and women follow God’s plan, the mystery of divine love will work in their human love, they will reach real happiness and fulfillment in their lives, and they will transform human society in a marvelous way.

So often in our world today purity and chastity are downplayed as “old-fashioned” or “too demanding.” In hearing the word chastity some people will even roll their eyes or give knowing smiles — smiles that really know nothing. Or they will not want to think or hear about it any more, because they may have to change their way of acting. In addition, it is well known that the film industry often portrays chaste or virtuous persons as stiff or prudish, while glamorizing or at least justifying men and women who have illicit sexual affairs. Conversations, the world of fashion, the behavior and words of so many people both young and old in our society —all seem to promote a kind of permissiveness or casualness about sexual actions which are immoral but which many now accept as “normal” or as legitimate “self-fulfillment,” a term that actually comes from the sixties when the so-called sexual revolution began.

With the help of the Holy Spirit and the perennial teachings of the Church, we need to reject these temptations from a broken and obsessed world, and make an affirmation of love and fidelity to the true meaning of sexuality in our lives as God has intended it. “This at last is bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh. . . . For this reason a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife. . .” (Gen. 2:24). God desires the union of man and woman for mutual love and support within marriage, and as a result of that love and union, he desires children who will reflect his goodness in a special way. As we read in the magnificent text of Genesis: “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. And God blessed them and God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth. . .’” (Gen. 1:27-28). The Lord therefore loves children and new human life; he generously creates an immortal soul, made in his own image and likeness, in every child conceived as the fruit of the union between man and woman.

In following God’s commands the man and woman find their true dignity and fulfillment. They can truly be called co-creators with God and cooperators of his loving plan. But when a person makes sexual pleasure an end in itself, outside of that plan, he or she commits a grave sin. In other words, they are using this great power, meant to be a joyful affirmation of fidelity and life within the covenant of marriage, to be a mere stimulation for selfish purposes. For this reason the Church has always taught that it is morally wrong for a person to seek sexual pleasure outside of the marriage act, or in frustration of it: for instance, by performing impure acts with another, by masturbation (the seeking of sexual pleasure with oneself alone), by adultery (sexual relations with someone other than one’s lawful spouse), by fornication (having relations outside of marriage), and by homosexual actions. Not only are these actions grave sins in themselves, but it is also wrong to desire or entertain them in the mind or imagination, which is what the ninth commandment says. Sins against the ninth commandment, if there is full knowledge and consent, can be mortal sins as well. We should not forget Christ’s own statement regarding interior thoughts and desires: “If a man so much as looks at a woman with lust in his heart, he has already committed adultery with her” (Matt. 5:28).

All of the above actions break or violate God’s loving plan for human beings; they are not open to the real meaning of sex, which is the complete giving of man and woman to each other in the marriage covenant, and the mutual openness to the life which can come from it. This is also why contraception is a mortal sin. Though there has been much dissent over the last thirty years, though a large percentage of couples — Catholics and non-Catholics — are practicing it, it is a grave offense against God’s law of life and love for sexual relations. Contraception separates the unitive from the procreative meaning of married love, as Pope Paul VI affirmed in the encyclical Humanae Vitae. Couples who practice contraception, whether by withdrawal, or by condoms, or by pills or any other unnatural act, are really hurting their own relationship in a very deep way. In the words of Pope John Paul II in his document on the family: “They manipulate and degrade human sexuality and with it themselves and their married partner. . .” (Familiaris Consortio, no. 32). Contraception is a holding back and a failure to give oneself completely to one’s spouse, and therefore in itself is a kind of falsification or lie (cf. ibid., n. 32), even if the other partner permits or even encourages it.

From all that we have just said, it is clear that chastity is a truly positive virtue; it really protects the individual and the couple themselves, by opening them to a complete and clean love with the joy that this brings. And precisely because it is so positive, it also must prohibit and forbid something. Often we need a big wall to protect a garden, especially if there are wild animals and other pests that could eat or trample on the flowers. In our ecological age, so sensitive to the environment, it is wonderful that our Mother the Church is also sensitive to the interior, personal environment of purity and self-giving which is at the basis of every marriage. For a couple to have relations in the way God wills them is really to protect their marriage, and assure their personal happiness. “Don’t you know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, and that you have been bought at a great price?” (1 Cor. 6:19), Saint Paul once again affirms to the early Christians. Since God the Holy Spirit is Love and Life, a couple that wants communion with him must also respect the love and life in their own bodies and in their sexual relationship. Any other kind of action is a violation of the Holy Spirit’s presence.

In all of these matters you need to be confident, with the mentality of victory in your souls. Be convinced that with God’s grace you can live the virtue of purity well, and give good example to those around you, as the early Christians did. “You are the light of the world,” our Savior said, “so let your light shine among men” (Matt. 5:14). Young women in high school or college: you can be truly outstanding among your classmates, you can help them greatly, if you resist peer pressure to do immoral things, and if you know how to reserve sex for marriage. Men, both old and young: show that true manliness consists of fidelity to God’s law, and the courage to guard against temptations on the internet, on business trips, at the office, and at the local news stand. Children: love what is clean and beautiful in life, and avoid bad words, or dirty pictures and games. Couples: demonstrate the greatness of true and complete married love, and do not be afraid of negative remarks because you do not contract or abort, or you have more than three children! What will the relatives or neighbors say if you have another child? Who cares what they say! Apart from being a great blessing, children are actually the best security in a very shaky world, where economic prosperity comes and goes. With many children to support you in the future, you have the best investment. And with the love and attention that you give them now, your future will truly be protected.

Notice how positively Our Savior speaks about holy purity: “Blessed are the clean of heart, for they shall see God” (Matt. 5:8). With the virtue of purity we can see life and people more clearly, and we can appreciate God’s actions in them more readily. We don’t look at men and women as objects of personal pleasure or advancement, but as our brothers and sisters created in God’s image and likeness, and redeemed by Christ. We do not become obsessed with sex or sexual topics, but we do know how to avoid occasions of sin, both by knowing ourselves honestly and the world around us.

In one of his homilies Blessed Josemaria Escriva, the founder of Opus Dei, said “You should get into the habit of taking the battle to areas that are far removed from the main walls of the fortress” (Homily “For They Shall See God,” n. 186 in the book Friends of God, Scepter Press, New York 1990). With a little common sense we will know what to do. Certain movies, magazines and places of entertainment can only bring trouble, since a lot of evil can enter through the eyes. We should not fool ourselves by saying that it is only art, or that we are admiring “human beauty,” or that we’re adults now and can watch such things, or go to immoral places of entertainment. That old saying “what stains a young man also stains an old man” is very true. The Lord himself warned us clearly against the occasions of sin: “The eye is the lamp of the body. So, if your eye be sound, your whole body will be full of light; but if your eye is not sound, your whole body will be full of darkness” (Matt. 6:22).

Something similar applies to conversations. There is no need to keep talking about sex and the scandals related to it; it is a subject, as one author put it, that “sticks like tar.” A follower of Christ is grateful for the gift of sex within marriage, and gives thanks for the differences between men and women, but he does not abuse the gift nor does he delight in speaking about its abuse. If friends of yours keep telling jokes or making innuendoes about sexual matters, I suggest that you try to change the subject, or perhaps talk about the obvious need for purity and self-control in this poor world of ours.

And if we should have a fall, either big or small, in this matter, let’s make an immediate act of contrition and go to Confession as soon as possible. There Christ awaits us, for he is the good shepherd who is anxious to forgive our sin and give us the grace to do better. There is no need to be carrying around a feeling of dirtiness or despair, when our souls can be cleansed by the great sacrament of divine mercy. That is why Christ instituted it. Grown-ups who don’t go to Confession are like foolish children who don’t want to be cleaned, or even worse, like certain animals who prefer to live in the mud.

God use of time, temperance in food and drink, modesty in the way you and your children dress. Each one could be an entire topic for your consideration. All of them are important for preserving this great and ennobling virtue called purity, which is so needed in the United States today. It could provide such happiness and freedom if only people would sincerely try to practice it! Let’s ask Our Lady, the Mother of Jesus, for her assistance. As we say in the entrance antiphon on the Feast of the Immaculate Conception: “Thou art all fair, virgin Mary, and the stain of original sin is not in thee.” Though she never committed a sin, she does understand our weakness and our temptations. Let us go to her with confidence. Let us ask her to help us to appreciate that chastity is really a great and generous yes to God . . . either in the single or married state. For when we say yes to the sixth and ninth commandments, we say yes to our families and friends, we say yes to human life, we say yes to the very purpose for which we were made. Amen.

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