More than I Want to Know
If we were to listen to what goes on in the locker room at halftime of a NBA game, either television folks would have to do a lot of bleeping or we would have to develop a new tolerance for profanity. Surely, neither would make the game more enjoyable.
by Jim Fair | Source:
Would you really like to know what goes on in the locker room at halftime during a professional basketball game?
You may have the opportunity, if the media reports this past week are accurate. The National Basketball Association (NBA) apparently is thinking about putting a live microphone on all players and coaches during all games – and during halftimes. That means that you would be able to hear what the players and coaches are saying – pretty much at all times.
I suppose this could be interesting, but I fear there could be some problems.
In an ideal world, we would hear the following exchange between two players during a game:
PLAYER A: Please excuse me, as I was reaching for the ball I accidentally hit your nose.
PLAYER B: Don’t worry, anyone can make a mistake and I know you and your family are wonderful people.
This not being an ideal world, I expect the exchange would be more like this:
PLAYER B: You #*#*#*# hit my nose and there is *#*#*#*#* blood all over the place.
PLAYER A: *#*#*#*# you and your *#*#*#*#* mother.
In an ideal world, the coach’s halftime talk would go something like this: “OK, gentlemen, we trail our noble opponents by 20 points. I have to admire their fine effort during the first half. Please try much harder after halftime so we can honor both ourselves and our opponents by the purity and strength of our play.
In the real world, I expect the talk would go more like this: We are 20 *#*#* points behind and you are a bunch of lazy *#*#*#*.
Frankly, I don’t assume that all players and coaches swear all the time. But I have observed that a good many of the professional players exhibit behavior just a tiny step above that of common thugs. So, my guess is that in the heat of competition between people who are paid millions of dollars a year to dribble a ball…well…there will be a few cases of serious potty mouth.
That means the television folks will have to do a lot of bleeping or we’ll have to develop a new tolerance for profanity. Frankly, I don’t think either will make the game more enjoyable to watch.
What do players say to each other during the game? What is conversation like in the locker room at halftime? Don’t answer – just leave it to my imagination.
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